Podcast

Natalie Bradley

[00:00:00] Welcome to the Unshakable Hope Podcast, where real life intersects redeeming love. I’m Kellie Hall, and this is where we wrestle through faith questions, such as how do I trust God’s heart when His ways and delays are breaking mine? We’ll hear from people just like you and me, who have experienced God’s faithfulness when life didn’t unfold as they expected.

My prayer is that God would renew our hope in His Word and His love through these conversations.

Kelly: Hey guys. I can’t wait for you to hear about this beautiful ministry that is growing like crazy in Santa Cruz, California. It’s called Beloved Restoration. Today you’ll be hearing from Natalie Bradley. who is the founder and executive director of this nonprofit. The two of us were introduced through a mutual friend, and also one of the members on her board is another mutual friend.

You might remember Jen [00:01:00] Thompson, who I’ve interviewed on this podcast, where she talked about her adventures in launching Rockbridge Ranch with her husband. Natalie has been involved with youth and women’s ministry for over 25 years. I wish we would have met years ago, Natalie.

And she recently graduated with a master’s in ministry leadership from Western Seminary And I just don’t know how she did all that with her busy family and her busy ministry. I know you’re going to love her heart and you’re going to be inspired by her story.

So Natalie, welcome to the podcast. I’m so glad you’re here.

Natalie: Thank you. I’m so honored to be here today with you.

Kelly: THe first time I heard about this ministry, I told you, Natalie, that this needs to be in every area of our nation. And I believe it will be one day. And we will talk more about that in just a minute. I can’t wait. But for now, why don’t you start by just telling us about your family?

Natalie: Yeah. I have four kids, three boys, one girl told her she can, [00:02:00] she has to live next to me for the rest of her life. And yeah it’s the juggle of carrying a ministry that God has put on my heart out of my own journey and. And the ministry to my family and my children and my husband, we’ve been married 19 years and we actually moved to Santa Cruz 10 years ago, and it was a part of a little bit of my story of leaving a community.

We had been in for so long and starting over in this new community where we knew no 1. That God could clearly called us missionally to be here. Yeah. But I love being a mom. My daughter rides horses. I love being outside. I mountain bike and it’s a great area to be in for how active my family is.

Kelly: No kidding. I love looking at pictures of your family and all the activities y’all do together.

Natalie: We are very busy. Yes.

Kelly: You are a person of high capacity. That’s been obvious ever since I met you. It was I wanted you to just step into my [00:03:00] office and give me tips and hints on how to become more productive.

But I know that one of the things that I know from being involved in ministry myself is when you pour out so often and you take care of a family, you sometimes forget to be filled up again. I love to know what resuscitates joy in you when you get weary.

Natalie: Oh, that’s such a good question.

I love that. Yes, I’m actually an introvert. And so people who see my life are like, no way. Cause I’m doing a lot of extroverting. But it is critical to me. I wake up very early to have this quiet space where the house is just quiet and I can sit before the Lord. Sometimes I just literally sit and look at the fire and listen.

And sometimes that involves reading my Bible and journaling and stuff like that. But if I don’t do that morning hour my day just is off. It just feels off. I also started a new rhythm of adding this, [00:04:00] it’s called a reflective retreat into my yearly schedule. And I like it so much and it has done so much for my soul and just slowing that pace that for one weekend that I invited the leadership at our church and where I’m bringing them to this retreat this year.

And because I want them to see how critical it is to just take time to reflect and be still and worship and not have all, we don’t do a bunch of activities at these retreats. It’s really. There’s painting things that are reflective. But I found that to be a lifeline for me last year and just stepping out.

Of the busyness and doing something like that.

I have a team of women, a small group of women. We actually went on a little retreat together and prayed over each other and talked through our ministries and the things that were stirring on our hearts.

And it’s so important to Have those women in your life [00:05:00] where I can text them at midnight, they may not respond, but I can text at midnight and say, I woke up and I’m just in anxiety over this, whatever that is. And that has been significant for giving me the courage to continue to step into areas where God’s calling me to step into.

Kelly: Wow. That is beautiful. And I love that you developed a rhythm of. Silence in the mornings in your morning times. I have also incorporated that time. I’m also an introvert and it is hard for us introverts when we get called into extroverted spaces, we get filled up by being quiet and when I’m silent with the Lord, it really does open up a space to listen and he does work in silence that we don’t even understand.

Natalie: Yeah, totally.

Kelly: Now I know behind every ministry, there’s a story of origin. There’s a realization of a deep [00:06:00] need. There’s a stirring in your heart. And so I’d love for you to share your personal story and how God led you to the place where this ministry was birthed.

Natalie: Yeah, I have my own recovery story and it was quite a journey for me of realizing that I was using alcohol to mask my struggles, my inward struggles and, everybody’s story is different. Like for me, when I heard the word alcoholic, I had the idea of drinking all day and you’re like laying on the side of the road, or I just had this like idea of what it was and when, and for me, in my journey I had an audible word from the Lord where he was like, you have to stop, like alcohol has got to be removed from your life. And I knew that I was drinking a couple too many glasses of wine every once in a while. And, but again, it wasn’t every day. So I was like, ah, and when he [00:07:00] called me out of the hiding and out of the. Gosh, the anxiety, my anxiety had gone up significantly. The unmanageability in my life was so evident to everyone but me, and then God’s hello.

And this is where having those friends, those close friends who can speak truth into your life are so critical. I had a friend call me and I was really at my bottom. I had just. I had started to drink way more and my life was just unmanageable and she called and she was like, how are you doing? And it was the critical moment where I could just brush it under the rug and be like, oh, I’m fine.

Or I could speak. The truth of what was going on. And I’m so grateful to God that I chose the latter. I told her, I was like, I’m not doing well. And I don’t know what to do. I just don’t even know what next steps to take. I could not believe it. She was like Natalie, I do. So I’m coming to your house right now and I’m going to introduce you to someone.

And I [00:08:00] was like, what she did, she introduced me to who’s now my been my mentor for years and a woman who has. Lived out sobriety for 19 plus years and a discipler of Christ. And she just came and sat with me on my couch for hours and we talked and she showed me the next steps. And so out of that journey, it was about a year later.

I was in the bathtub with water and God talking to

Kelly: us, but I know there’s something about showers and bathrooms.

Natalie: I was there and it was just this it was again, this there are more women like you, Natalie. And, I suddenly called one of my mentors who’s also been sober about, I think she’s at 20 years now.

And I said. We need a women’s space, a space for women to be able to say the name of Jesus, but then also talk about. [00:09:00] These struggles and whether it’s a struggle with alcoholism or eating disorders, you’ll find in the recovery world. A lot of us will say, oh I also struggled in this area. And there’s not usually just 1 thing but there’s the 1 thing that brought us to our knees, right?

There’s usually an area. That brought us to our knees where God was like, it’s time. This is time

Kelly: okay. Just to set a little more of the context, you’ve had a really busy job, right? Can you describe what kind of a job that was?

Natalie: My career prior.

Kelly: Yes.

Natalie: Yeah. Yes. My career, I was working over the hill in tech. And so yeah, you’re, I’m in that Bay area full speed ahead. My husband’s traveling to China and I’m raising four kids on my own. A lot of the times I’m home alone. I wasn’t raising them on my own.He helped a lot, when he’s in China, he can’t help and then working at the, in the tech environment is just high speed

Kelly: okay. Yeah. So just [00:10:00] that helps understand the context a little bit more. Thank you okay, so back into your story.

Natalie: Yeah and so once I called her and said that, she goes, oh, I don’t know why I have not thought of this. Now, mind you, we’re in the middle of the pandemic and, or the beginning of it. And so we called the church and we just said, this is, we know everything’s shut down right now, the Bay area, everything really shut down.

And we said, but we think women really need this, right? Especially right now where isolation is happening and So we went for it and launched Beloved and the first meeting, we had 25 women show up with masks and we were the only meeting at the time on campus at church and yeah, so clearly I think that is just such a testament to it being God’s yeah, being God’s because [00:11:00] only God could move in that way where we weren’t like advertising.

Everything was shut down and that 25 women would walk into that door that the need was already there and he knew it.

Kelly: Yes, I love that. Yeah, you can see God’s hand all over it. The way God spoke to you so clearly to that was rather unique and there was no denying it.

Natalie: No, there was not.

Kelly: God is so gracious that way. , so I’d love for you to explain the mission of Beloved Restoration and what makes it unique.

Natalie: Yes. Yeah. So beloved is a Christ based 12 step recovery program just for women. And we do this in partnership with churches so that we are we are a front porch. I like to describe it to a church so that they can say, Hey, come to our front porch.

Come to this women’s space, find healing and restoration, whatever that struggle is. So we aren’t one [00:12:00] specific struggle. You can have an eating disorder. You can be supporting a child or spouse who struggles. We have a lot of women who are coming and working through codependency and anxiety that just cripples them.

I think, especially since the pandemic. That has, that area has grown significantly. We call it the, like the, like tidal wave of hurt has hit. And we went through these years of what just happened? And now all that buried trauma and hurt is the tidal wave is hitting. And, we have women that come who are working through alcoholism through drugs.

It’s a whole wide variety of struggles and it’s a safe space for them to share anonymously and to point each other to Christ.

Kelly: That’s beautiful. It sounds like such a special meeting time. It sounds so safe and I’m sure it must feel so welcoming. I love the whole front porch. That’s cool.[00:13:00] So just to help people understand a question I’ve had, I know is this your own curriculum?

How does it compare to celebrate recovery? And what can you’ve described a little bit of this, but I’d love to know, more about what the focus is

Natalie: great. So we do one step a month. And so the core root of it is the 12 steps of alcoholics anonymous. And we use a curriculum it’s called the 12 steps, a spiritual journey.

And for now we’re, we’ve been using that because it’s very Christ focused. So it’ll go through the 12 steps, but ask these questions about your relationship with God. It goes into your childhood. And. We don’t really use the workbook in the meeting. It’s more of a home heart work. And then when we come into the meeting, we’ll say today, we’re talking about step 1, we’ll do a little reading and then they will open up the share to talk around where they’re working on step 1 in their life.

Our prayer, one of our biggest [00:14:00] prayer is we’re a tiny nonprofit and growing quickly is to raise the funds to be able to have our own curriculum someday. That is definitely a dream of ours.

Kelly: Yes. Yes. I know that will be really special as it focuses more on women and their needs. And I think too, that you mentioned a lot of the focus and a lot of the healing happens as women come to know their identity in Christ. So they come to know who God is more fully and who they are more fully. Can you talk about that a little bit?

Natalie: Yes. Yes. How do I not cry when I, um, my, some of my favorite stories and again, we’re anonymous.

So I’ll keep these very general, but I. Is when women come, we’ll say, we encourage you to come five times. And cause it’s really scary to step in those doors. I remember my first meeting, I’m a believer. I love Jesus and I have this struggle and there was so much shame and I just. [00:15:00] I walked into, we have a general recovery meeting at our church as well.

And that was my first meeting I went into and I was terrified. I sat in the back. I had a hoodie on and I’m just like, I’m so afraid, like who’s going to see me and just so I was just covered in shame and. I, to watch women come in who feel that same shame and then to leave with just a little bit lighter, like they just leave a little bit lighter where God’s let, take that yoke.

I, I’m going to bear that burden for you is what Beloved is. And. You’ll see them come back the second time and then the third time and usually by the fifth time. They are sold. They’re like smiling. They are in. They realize that they’re not alone. That they don’t have to carry that shame that he bought that on the cross.

It’s done. And they can talk about, okay, what are my next steps? And here are sisters in Christ who walked it ahead of me. [00:16:00] And I don’t have to do it alone. And I that is beloved. And that is the women experience there and it is the best. I feel like I am so lucky to get to watch, I get to watch firsthand transformation of God’s redemption in their lives.

It’s awesome.

Kelly: Awesome. I watched one of the testimonies and this young woman just got pretty emotional as she started talking about how much she learned and now believes about how much God loves her.

Natalie: Yes. Yes, and we find our identity in Christ, um, I was talking with 1 of the women yesterday who I would love to share her.

She gave me permission to share her story. And. We were talking about how there’s a point where suddenly you feel okay in your skin, and she’s like her eyes like lit up and she’s I’m okay. He has covered me and loves me so deeply that even though the road ahead feels scary. She goes, I feel.

She goes, I can’t [00:17:00] describe it other than I feel okay in my skin. And I’m like, yes. Amen, sister. That’s just, that’s it right there.

Kelly: I heard a woman ask one time, what would it be like? Excuse me. I heard a woman ask one time, what would it be like to be so secure in the love of God? When you walk into a room that you’re not thinking about yourself and how people are perceiving you And one of the things I think it would be like is just your shoulders drop You notice you’re not holding them up close to your ears.

They just drop you’re so comfortable in your own skin And people like that when you see them walking in this freedom and confidence in the lord it’s visible and it’s radiant

Natalie: Amen agreed

Kelly: And the transformation that you get to witness. Oh, that is so beautiful. . 1 of the things that I told you, I know, I expect that 1 day, this ministry will be available across the nation, every area and [00:18:00] so I’d love for you to talk about some of the processes.

I know you’ve mentioned, I know there’s fear and there’s anxiety when God is throwing open doors and it’s becoming bigger than you’re ready for, but I’d love to hear about some of the processes and prayers in the ways you are transitioning so that your ministry can have a bigger reach.

Natalie: Yes. Oh, what a great question.

Yes. I I call it like we’re building the plane as it’s flying. It’s how it feels like, okay, we need a wing now.

So we are God is so awesome. And again, it’s just, his timing is so perfect. And so when I do get into fear, so I love that you said that because yes. I wake up at night sometimes and I’m like, no, I don’t want to do that. And it’s exactly that. God just says, trust me. Like I, I’m holding this. This is my ministry, not mine.

And some of the things that he has done is we have an incredible [00:19:00] board. So we have six women on our board, including myself. And these women are so wise and love Jesus and love beloved restoration and recovery. And just are helping to kind of shape that next step. So right now we just became our own nonprofit.

We were under Rockside Ranch, which was such a gift. And we were able to take that step out of faith and become our own nonprofit. And so we’re in that realm of getting ready for what God has ahead. We are now at four churches in the area. Which still blows my mind. And we are putting in place that just happened this week.

We are putting in place what we’re calling site coordinators. So we’re having one woman from each church who has been attending that church and beloved to be the overseer of that church where right now it’s just been me, which that doesn’t give capacity for it to grow. And we do, we want my prayer is [00:20:00] any church that would want beloved can have it.

There’s such a need. I guarantee that there is a need in every community for a beloved. But then at the same time, I’m like, how’s that going to happen? So this is our next step in making that possible. And so I’m excited to see what he’s going to do.

Kelly: Oh, me too. I can’t wait. Yeah, that’s a lot.

1 of the things that Jamie Winship says, I don’t know if you’ve heard of him before, but he says, if you gather CEOs from all over the biggest. Companies in the nation and ask them, what is your greatest fear? Every single one of them will say something along the lines of, I’m not enough. This is too big for me.

And once they start telling the truth about their fears, then they’re able in that place of honesty and authenticity to grow to a place of greater courage as God speaks to them because they can’t hear. You can’t hear God speaking when [00:21:00] fear has them trapped,

Natalie: right? That’s so good. I like that.

Kelly: Yeah, I love that too.

That’s one of the, in my times of silence with the Lord in the morning, I will often ask myself, Lord, help me see what I am most afraid of right now and then just give it to the Lord. And it really does open up the next steps because otherwise what happens is the fear is deep inside of you and is anxiety and you don’t understand the root, right?

And that can hold you trapped. Okay. So I know that one day you were talking about having an actual physical home where women who are in crisis can stay. Can you tell us about that vision?

Natalie: It’s such a tough space because I, we tried so hard for the past two years to make that happen to have a residential home, a home for restoration of women, because we do have a lot of women, not a lot, we have. A handful of women that attend across the four meetings who don’t [00:22:00] have somewhere to live or looking for somewhere to live and find that whole life restoration.

And Santa Cruz is really expensive and we just ran up to wall after wall in that journey. We just heard God saying not yet. And right now to grow the roots deep of beloved restoration and what the ministry is and where he is growing it and trust him with that rest. But that it’s so interesting because that vision of the home, God actually planted in my heart in middle school.

And I was talking with a young woman in middle school in the bathroom and she was struggling with an eating disorder and I just she shared with me her story and I went home and I wept and I wrote in my book actually wrote it. A paper on it. I was like, what if there was a home for girls to go and garden and work and find a loving, have a loving family and community that would be [00:23:00] this holistic approach.

I didn’t say those words in middle school, but now I know to be this holistic approach to restoration. So it’s a not now, but maybe someday.

Kelly: That vision was planted in you by the Lord.

Natalie: yeah. So yeah.

Kelly: Gosh, that’s beautiful. I’ve always been a collector of stories, Natalie, and that’s what this podcast is so much about is it’s just a place to highlight the stories of God’s faithfulness and stories that really highlight God’s redemptive heart as well. And your story is one of those stories is you’ve just come full circle. You’ve always been this high capacity person, but then you’ve, you had some struggles and came full circle and started a ministry out of those places and now you’re seeing transformation in such deep, deep ways in women’s lives. So I would love if you could share as you protect the privacy of people, just some of the stories that you have experienced[00:24:00] that highlights the healing journey you’ve seen where women are rescued from their false identities about who they are and who God is.

Natalie: Yes. So we have a woman in our in Beloved, one of our Beloveds that just recently has given permission to share her story. It is such a powerful story and we will be having it highlighted on our website in the future. But she wrote me and she said, Beloved has not only saved my life, but my unborn son’s life.

Words can’t express how grateful I am for that. When I first arrived in the room, I was scared, broken, and lost. Today, six months later, actively working the steps with my sponsor, I have a new meaning and purpose in life. I have chosen to keep my baby. It has restored my faith and trust in God, and has given me a second chance at living a life in Christ.

The chains of my [00:25:00] addiction have been broken and the beautiful angels I have met in the room have given me so much love and hope. I truly love myself and my new life, the good, the bad, and the craziness of it. I feel eternally everlasting love as cherished daughter of God. And I’m forever grateful to Beloved for reminding me of that and the new life it has given me.

And, we are throwing her a baby shower and just, she said, I’ve never had a space where I was so warmly accepted. There was no shame. There was no condemnation as she contemplated what to do with this. This unborn child and God put the burden on her. She chose to keep it because she knew she had a community to help her come, come alongside her.

And suddenly it wasn’t as scary. And that was just what was so beautiful about her story. She’s sober. She just [00:26:00] shines Jesus. And all that she’s doing and I just, that baby, God’s going to do something with that baby. I tell you.

Kelly: Beautiful. Oh gosh. After I wiped all my tears. That’s so sweet. I’m really thankful. She was willing to let you share that. I just read a quote this morning.

It’s from the book, The Garden Within by Dr. Anita Phillips. It says the fact that God loves us broken is so much better than if he just loved us perfect. That’s so good. And she just, she invites us to bask in his love as we sit in our imperfections. And it’s such a beautiful picture of just. What you described earlier, this woman feeling comfortable in her own skin. That’s what God’s love does transforms us from the inside out.

Natalie: Yes, totally. And I think the other part to Beloved is we’re about discipleship. So once you’ve been coming for a [00:27:00] while, we have volunteer roles that you could step into for four months.

I, that’s another part that makes me giggle. I just love it because you see these women stepping into role leadership roles that they’ve never done before. And usually there’s a little bit of fear and they’re like, I can’t do this. I’m not a leader or, and they can, and they do an awesome job. And I think, and then once they step in, I had a gal the other day, she cracked me up, she’s okay, when I’m done with this job, I’m going to step into the other job and then I want to do the other one and I’m like, great.

So they get, they realize Oh, I can do this. And this is a part of my healing journey. It’s a part of the program and ownership and accountability and and then learning how to serve others around us, right? Once we get outside of ourselves, suddenly our stuff doesn’t feel quite as big. I have some neat women in the journey that have now stepped into leadership roles that I just. I see them and I’m [00:28:00] like, they’re a different woman. Yes. blows my mind.

Kelly: Yeah. Because when you walk it out in a leadership position, then you’re actually having the opportunity to say, I really believe the transformation that happened in me is real and deep and true and lasting. And so as you walk it out and share it with other people, it becomes more entrenched and it goes deeper and the love of God becomes even bigger in your life.

Yeah. Oh, I love it. Okay. I’m wondering if you would leave us with a nugget of hope or encouragement. What would you like to say to women out there today?

Natalie: God is not done writing your story. And if you are struggling and you have a space that you’re hiding in a back closet and you’re saying, no, that’s too dark for God. It’s not. He is bigger than it and I want to encourage you to find a safe space to share that journey and to find [00:29:00] accountability and support.

We do offer zoom. Beloved over zoom so you can message there’s a chat box on my you can email me, but there’s also a chat box on the website and I can send you the zoom information and we have a zoom on Monday mornings from 10 to 1130 pacific standard time and on Thursday evenings, 630 to 8 PM pacific standard time.

So that is an option for those of you who don’t live in the Santa Cruz San Jose area.

Kelly: Would they be joining a group if they zoom in?

Natalie: Yeah, they would just zoom in, yeah. And that is an important part to Beloved, is there is no commitment. It’s a six week series. We are, every week, All 4 meetings happen every week, rain or shine, and you can join at any time and you can leave at any time but we find for the most part, if women attend 5 times, they, it’s a lifelong journey together.

Kelly: Okay, so [00:30:00] if they go to beloved restoration, that’s the website name and I will put a link in the show notes. They can just click on the contact.

Natalie: Yeah, but you can contact me via email on there or there’s a chat box that they can just chat with me. And I can give them the zoom, say, I would love the zoom link. And then I can send that to you. We don’t post it for security reasons, but we can privately send it to you. And that might be a way for you to see what is beloved about and then, if you’re wanting it at your church, same, reach out to me and let me know. And we can start those discussions as well.

Kelly: Oh, that’s wonderful. Thank you so much for sharing this with us. Thank you for sharing your heart. I’m excited to see where this is going to go.

Natalie: Same. And one last thing We need prayer. We are looking for people who want to partner with us. If you’re an organization that missionally partners, we are tiny and looking for mission partners as well to partner with us, with this mission of restoration [00:31:00] for women. And I just. He is moving in big ways and lives are being transformed. So please feel free. We also do have a newsletter. So if you want, if women want to be a part of that, men or women, you’re welcome to join that as well.

Kelly: Okay. And you do have a donate button on your website as well, right? Yes, we do. We take monthly donations, one time donations. We have all the options for that as well. That keeps us going.

Thank you so much for sharing your time with me, Natalie. This has been wonderful.

Natalie: Same. Really enjoyed it. I wish we could talk for hours.

Kelly: Me too. Me too.

If you were encouraged in your faith today, it’d be great if you’d help get the word out by subscribing, sharing with a friend, or leaving a review. I’d love to hear from you. You can reach out through my website, kellyhall. org, and pick up some free resources while you’re there. Thanks for listening to the Unshakable Hope Podcast.[00:32:00]